I'm baaaaaaack!

Hi everyone! I'm just typing a quick post here to let you guys know that I have returned safely. I just got back from Glow's house about 1/2 hour ago. I'm so fucking tired, you have no idea. But it was all worth it. I had such an amazing time, with such amazing people. Although it's great to be home, I really don't want to be sitting here in my apartment right now. I want to be back in Carey and Michelle's living room just laughing and having a gay (ha) old time. I will post a much more detailed update soon. Any pics I may post will probably take awhile, seeing as how I'm still in the dark ages with my 35mm camera. Heh.

*waves to everyone* *smooches*

Sappy love songs

How I love them so.

I was in my bedroom this past weekend, taking a clothes inventory and seeing how it would all fit in my suitcase, when a song came on the radio. I had never heard it before, but it grabbed my attention immediately. I sat down and listened to the words and started to bawl my eyes out. It really spoke to me, perhaps because one of my greatest fears is that I will die alone, never having had someone to love me. *sigh*

"I Will Follow You Into the Dark" by Death Cab for Cutie

Watch the video here. (The video is kinda dumb and takes away from the song, IMO. So if you're going to click this link, I suggest you close your eyes and just listen to the beauty of the song. Pay no attention to the dorky guy with the guitar. *grin*)

Love of mine
Someday you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark
No blinding light
Or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
And illuminate the "no"s
On their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In catholic school
As vicious as roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised
By a lady in black
And I held my tongue
As she told me "Son,
Fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
And illuminate the "no"s
On their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

You and me
Have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes
Are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
But it's nothing to cry about
'Cause we'll hold each other soon
In the blackest of rooms

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
And illuminate the "no"s
On their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark

I immediately went and downloaded this song, and I've listened to it countless times since then. I cry every time. I'm even crying now just reading the words over. It's so touching.

What are your favorite sappy love songs?


Note: This post brought to you by the letters P M and S. And the number 3. (3 MORE DAYS!!!!) *grin*

Boring update

I don't really have much to update about. I went on yet another shopping excursion last night. *sigh* I swear, I've done more shopping in the past 3 months than I've done in the past 3 years combined. And? I'm still.not.done. I cannot find a lightweight jacket or a plain old sweatshirt anywhere. I went to like 6 stores last night. Grrrr. I guess I'll just have to be cold. *shrug* I should've ordered them online, you can find anything online, but now it's probably too late.

I cannot believe that I will by flying to SF in just 8 days. OMH. I'm so excited. I can't wait to hang out with Glow, Carey and Michelle again. I can't wait to meet Catt, Ginger and hopefully MM. And MTW? Still a no-go?

I wish I had something else to say. I know all my posts lately have been about Joshua, shopping, and my trip, but that's all that has been occupying my mind. Heh.

My pretend boyfriend...

turns 28 today! Happy Birthday to the man who makes me smile, laugh, and cry. The incredibly talented and beautiful, Josh Jackson.












Happy Birthday, my love! :D

*proud grin*

Note: This was written yesterday, but blogger was having their issues and I couldn't post it. Let's try again...

So, when I took driver's ed in high school, the manueverabilty (parallel parking, reversing, whatever you call it) part of the test was pretty much a joke. The instructor gave us step-by-step instructions on how to do it for that specific test- ie, when you see the cone in your sideview mirror, cut the wheel 1/2 way to the right, then when you notice the cone in your other mirror turn the wheel back, etc. Consequently, I never really learned the proper way to judge things when reversing. I've never felt comfortable when backing up, and parallel parking? fuggedabouit!
But! we went to lunch today at this place with a tiny parking lot with slanted spaces. All of the spaces going the same way I was going were filled, so I had to try and get into a slanted space that was going the opposite way. "Just back in" my mom says. I *snort* at her and say "Sure. Easy for you to say." But you know what? I did it perfectly on my first try! Right in the middle of the lines and perfectly lined up in the slanted space. I didn't have to "Austin Powers" it at all. It was like buttah, and I was so proud of myself. So proud that I rewarded myself with 2 long island iced teas. *hic* So if this post didn't make any sense at all, I blame the drink.

And since I'm updating and blogger seems to be letting people load pics, (I've been trying to load this pic for 3 days!) may I present to you Joshua Jackson's Fabulous Ass! *grin*





And just for your my enjoyment, some pictures of the man behind the behind. Or in front of the behind. You know what I mean. (to be added in later. Fuck you, Blogger!)


PS- I find it amusing that Blogger's spell check doesn't recognize the word "blogger" LOL.

Let Go, Jump In

This weekend I watched a movie called Americano starring my boyfriend Joshua Jackson. (side note: if that was not a body double, he has the most delicious bubble butt I've ever seen. I wanna squeeze it. mmmmm.) But anyway, the movie is about a guy going through a quarter-life crisis, not sure what he wants to do with his life or who he really is, who takes a trip with his two friends to Pamplona, Spain to participate in the running of the bulls. They meet up with a local woman who takes them around the country for various adventures. This movie really spoke to me. I wish I was the kind of person who loved travelling and new adventures, but I'm not. I'm always so afraid of new experiences, of things I don't know, and I generally just live in my little bubble of boring comfort. This movie made me want to change that. I want to do new things, try new things, learn about new things. And learn about myself in the process. (Gee, maybe I'm having a quarter-life crisis, too.) So, this is going to be my goal for my trip to San Francisco. To enjoy the experience of travelling to a new place and doing new things, without worrying all the time or being afraid and self-conscious to the point of paralysis. I want to go with the flow, be spontaneous, laid-back, take in all the sights and different walks of life, all without worrying. I want to have the trip of a lifetime. A trip that will change me, and motivate me to do something with my life instead of floating through on a routine every day. Maybe I'm expecting too much and putting too much pressure on a 4 day trip to California, maybe I should go run with the bulls instead LOL, but this is the furthest I've ever been away from home, the biggest trip I've ever taken, and I'm doing it for me, because it's something I want to do. Anything could happen, and for once I am not going to be afraid of whatever may come. At least I'm going to try. Maybe I need to watch this movie again right before I leave for inspiration (and also to see that ass again. mmmmm.)

A song that conveys what I'm feeling: (which coincidentally is from the great movie Garden State starring my former boyfriend Zach Braff and is also about a quarter-life crisis. Heh.)

Let Go, by Frou Frou

Drink up baby down
Are you in or are you out?
Leave your things behind
'Cause it's all going off without you
Excuse me
Too busy
Writing your tragedy
These mishaps
You bubble wrap
When you've no idea what you're like...

So let go (let go)
Jump in
Oh well whatcha waiting for
It's all right
'cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So let go (so let go)
Just get in
Oh it's so amazing here
It's all right
'cause there's beauty in the breakdown

It gains the more you give
and it rises with the fall
So hand me that remote
Can't you see that all that stuff's a sideshow
Such boundless pleasure
We've no time for later now
You can't await your own arrival
You've twenty seconds to comply

So let go (let go)
Jump in
Oh well whatcha waiting for
It's all right
'cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So let go (mm let go)
Just get in
Oh it's so amazing here
It's all right
'cause there's beauty in the breakdown (x2)

'cause there's beauty in the break down
Breakdown
So amazing here
'cause there's beauty in the breakdown

I *heart* Internet

I ordered some clothes from oldnavy.com on Wednesday night. They just arrived. Less than 48 hours! Amazing!

I liked one of the shirts I got so much that I took off the shirt I was wearing and put this one on instead. Heh.

So... I think all I still need for my trip is a new pair of sunglasses (rectangular! Michelle and Carey say so.) a new pair of tennis shoes and a lightweight jacket. Oh, and new bras. And a sweatshirt. *sigh* Will it ever end? I hate shopping!! Blah! Thank goodness for the internet.

*smooches computer*