My birthday is on Sunday. I’ll be 27 and I’m dreading it. Which is funny to me, because I’ve never really cared about age and I thought my sister was being silly when she was so down about her 30th. But, it’s not about the age. It’s not about the number 27. I know that 27 is still relatively young. It’s about where I am in my life, at 27. I’m still broke and alone and fat and unhappy. Seems like things never change. Every birthday and every New Year’s Eve, I tell myself that this year will be different. This year I will change, things will change. They never do. And it’s just hitting me hard this year.
Also, tomorrow is the 10th anniversary of my dad’s death. I don’t even know what to say about that. *sigh*
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If I could do it all again, I'd go back and change everything. If you gave me back those years, I'd do it all better, I swear.
22 comments:
*hugs* I sincerely hope you have a happy birthday. And I also hope that you come to terms with whatever it is that's holding you back from feeling happy. It might take some sacrifice and/or hard to work to get to that happy place, but it can be done. Don't dwell on past failures.
And always let us know if we can help by listening or other support. My twenties weren't great. We were broke, argued lots during a few years and I am overweight. It's taken probably eight years to start plowing through each of those issues. I guess my lesson learned is to bite off small chunks at a time and put mistakes behind.
*smooch and hugs to you*
Maybe this move for work could turn out to be a fresh start for you.
I agree with Kim too about the small chunks at a time.
*hugs* I agree with Kim and Boo about the small chunks. It can be really daunting to tackle a lot of big changes, but if you try to set smaller goals and reward yourself to achieving them, it is a little more managable.
I had a weird reaction to 27, too. I had set it as a kind of milestone age for myself and when I got there things weren't what I thought they'd be. I think that happens at some age, for most people.
*birthday hugs and wishes that things will change for the better for you this year*
Heh, I think I kinda said something similar in the email I just sent you.
Love you, Jen! *besa*
I love you and I am here for you around the clock. Any day. Any night. 24/7. I can't always offer new words but I can always offer you encouragement and support and a shoulder.
oh! My neighbor across the alley is moving. Nice little house. *grin*
I agree with Kimmer, Boo and Frodis. *smooch*
I hope you have a happy birthday.
*hugs* I agree with everybody up there. *points* Little chunks and don't look back. *smooch*
I hope you have a great birthday. Tell yourself that you will and make yourself have a wonderful birthday.
I play the number 27 on the roulette table and I win on that number a lot. See? It's good luck. *grin*
I totally freaked out when I turned 25. Funny how I look at your age today and I think you still have your whole life ahead of you. Try not to stress about goals that haven't been reached yet.
I know tomorrow will be a difficult and sad day for you. I do hope that you'll be able to find something to smile about on your birthday though. Please remember that you have lots of friends here that will be thinking of you and sending you lots of love.
*BIG HUGS & BIRTHDAY SMOOCHES*
If you want, I could come visit and assemble some binders for you.
Oh baby, you are so worthy of huge amounts of true happiness. I know it's a sad day for you, and a time to reflect on things that deeply hurt you and that's ok to take that time to see where you've been and jump start the process of new beginnings.
Sunday is going to be a big day for me and even in the midst of it all, I will be thinking awesome things for you and wishing you the best birthday yet. Besides graduating, one of my bestest friends will be celebrating another year here on this crazy spinning planet and I am oh so glad I have been a part of her life in some small way.
Celebrate and be happy, dammit! You deserve it, sweetie! I love you BIG!
{{{HUGS}}} Jen. All the others said the wise words, so {HUGS} is all I have to offer. I am really good at it though! ;-)
*smooch*
Happy Birthday!!! *spank*
*brings in tray of Jello shots* Good morning, birthday girl!
*hugs* and much love to you, sweetie.
Happy Birthday, Jen! I hope you have a wonderful day!
Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear shithead. Happy birthday to you.
*smoooooooooooooch*
Oooh, I want to give Jen a few birthday spankings!
Happy birthday, Jen!
I believe in birthday *smooches*, myself. Much less painful!
*smooch*
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*besa*
Happy Belated Birthday Jen!
I hope you know our arms are open for hugs and smooches. I am sorry you a sad annniversary so close to your birthday.
I like what Kim said up there about taking things one chunk at a time. First remember which side your gas tank is on.
So apparently I was nearby on your birthday! Sorry I missed it. You have such wonderful and close friends here in the box and you've made them friends IRL. Lucky you to have friends who love you. Hope you had a good birthday!
Miss you!
Scrap the manageable chunks. Pick one thing that sucks and take a month off work to deal with just that.
It's your life. You deserve to be happy.
(Note, I can barely finish doing the dishes, so feel free to ignore my advice)
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